I sleep all night and I work all day

This week on the  Art Anthropology of Style, we will learn about an increasingly common subspecies of New Yorker and where to find him.

URBAN LUMBERJACK

(homo sapiens beardus)

Physical Appearance:  Typically characterized by  dark-washed blue jeans (cuffed!),  sleek desert or Chelsea boots, rumpled plaid shirts, sleeve tattoos, and a proliferation of thick but well-groomed facial hair. Housekeys will probably be found hooked to the beltloops with a carabiner.

Habitat:  Spiritually, he lives a lonesome but fulfilling and peaceful life in the Adirondacks tapping maple syrup from trees and building wooden furniture from trees he cut down with nothing but his own determined hands and a hatchet. But actually he lives in Brooklyn and works in marketing.

Social Characteristics:  Occasionally spotted solo while roaming the wilds of Bushwick, longing for a big tree to chop down, though the urban lumberjack is more often found in pairs (as illustrated above) or small groups. Together, they crowd around small tables in low-lit bars with “rustic” interiors, sipping craft beer (the PBR favored by many other urban species for its inoffensive dependability and cost-effectiveness is frowned upon here) while discussing woodworking, the oppressiveness of consumerist culture, Radiolab, and craft beer.

Favorite Band:  Probably Fleet Foxes.

Related Subspecies:  the Urban Fisherman (switch out the plaid for navy-blue henleys, anchor tattoos).

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